The Whatever Rule: a life-changing approach to 2018

In the words made famous by Doris Day, Que Sera Sera. Whatever will be will be. 

I started 2018 filled with anxiety.

Over the past six months I’d created a blog and a social enterprise – two big steps outside of my comfort zone.

Now I felt like the weight was on me to make each of them a ‘success’.  And, what I wasn’t telling anyone (even myself), was that deep down, I didn’t know that I could.

2018 had to be do or die. Success or failure. Joy or despair.

And the only outcome I could consider was success. Except the little voice inside was constantly saying “but what if you fail?”.

Continue Reading

A challenge to beat all challenges?

“Less is more”

A few years back, my New Year’s resolution was a full year of buying nothing new.

I made it until August …

Then my willpower began to erode as I travelled around Europe for a couple of months and my birthday drew close.  I rationalised I wasn’t ‘really’ buying that new handbag in Greece because my parents had given me the money specifically to buy something for my birthday. (Rationalising has always been a ‘strength’ of mine!)

And then I bought myself another wee gift, and another … Could I really leave Italy without a leather jacket?!

You could say I ‘failed’, but I bought about five new things for myself that year — not a patch on what I would normally have bought. And I completely transformed the way I related to shopping, forever. To me, that’s unqualified success.

So this year I’m excited to be taking on another ‘nothing new’ challenge. But this year, it’s not so much about shopping, but ‘doing’.

Continue Reading

Getting (and giving) a new kind of high

Because you are alive, everything is possible – Thich Nhat Hanh

I’ve got a serious case of ‘giver’s high’.

I’ve just made my first three gifts at thegoodregistry.com, and I can’t believe how good it feels. I’m fizzing. I’m bubbling over with joy!

My first gift was to Trelise. She’s turning eight. She’s asking for donations to the SPCA instead of gifts for herself for her birthday.

Continue Reading

Cold feet, warm beaches, fear and courage

“Be sure you put your feet in the right place, then stand firm.” Abraham Lincoln

Cold feet. Of course I’ve heard of cold feet.

I know what it means. It’s backing away.

Like when you’re lying on the warm beach and go to get into the water, it’s too cold, and you step back. You want your feet back on the warm beach.

But I’ve learnt something new.

It’s not just a simile. It’s a real, physical thing.

For the first time in my life, I’ve felt it.

Continue Reading

What questions do you need to ask right now?

The question is just as important as the answer – Charlie Rose (Talk show host and journalist)

I’ve always asked a lot of questions.

I’ve had more than one first date where I was asked if I was really a police officer.

I’ve never been a police officer, but I did consider it when I was leaving school.

Instead I started my career in journalism — another obvious job for someone with a big penchant for questions.

So I’ve spent a big part of my life asking all sorts of questions, and being deeply interested in how people answer.

The trouble is I don’t always leave space for others to ask me anything. And until very recently, I never asked myself any of the probing questions that I so easily ask others.

Does that matter?

Continue Reading

Why you’d benefit from a break today

Tomorrow I head away on holiday for a few days.

That means I woke up today with the familiar pre-holiday feeling of ‘way too much to do’!

So I did what any efficient, effective person would do: I wrote down my to-do list then circled the top three.

Then I got out my water colours, and painted for a couple of hours…

Continue Reading

Commit yourself and providence moves too

Photo by Dyaa Eldin on Unsplash

Whatever you can do or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power and magic in it! – Goethe

It will cost $75,000…or thereabouts. It’s hard to say for sure.

Gulp.

Apart from buying a house, I’ve never spent $75,000 on anything, never considered it, never come close.

Who does that?!

Entrepreneurs do.

… so I guess I’m now officially an entrepreneur.

Continue Reading

How to get free from the shackles of shame

“You either walk inside your story and own it, or you stand outside your story and hustle for your worthiness” Dr. Brené Brown

I was eight when I started at my fourth primary school.

I wasn’t worried about fitting in or making friends. I was confident, chatty, adaptable.

Pretty soon I was friends with two sisters. They invited me to their home after school – a clear sign of firm friendship in my eight year old world.

A day or two later the bombshell came. My two new besties told me we couldn’t stay friends. Their parents had told them so.

Continue Reading

‘Do you think you are really happy?’

Whenever it feels like a dark day, remember that true light comes from within

“Do you think you are really happy?”

I was touched by the question from a young boy to his weary mother, in a film I saw this week.

She was living a good life: working, running a household, raising a son. Was she happy? Probably not. Did she want to confront that? Definitely not.

How is it that we get so caught up in ‘life’ that we lose touch with what makes us truly happy? How often do we stop and focus on what really matters to us?

Continue Reading

Ending a love affair with money

“I have enough money to last me the rest of my life – unless I buy something” – Jackie Mason (comedian).

When I was a kid I loved watching ‘It’s in the Bag‘.

I would yell at the TV “the money, the money” or “the bag, the bag” and feel my excitement swelling as the contents of the bag were revealed.

That might just have been the start of my love affair with money – and all the good things money can buy.

Continue Reading